I am

I am a Dreaming, Optimistic pessimist...
I wonder about my own, and others, future...
I hear melancholic Irish music play inside of me.
I see those around me wondering;
        Searching for something long lost...
I want to clearly express my feelings,
         ...and my self...
I am a dreaming, optimistic pessimist...

I pretend that i know what it is i'm doing,
       and what i want.
I feel the dark part of the heart; its black hole...
i touch and affect more people than i'll ever know.
I worry that i'm not competent...
       to fufill my destiny, or my fate.
I cry when i watch old films, listen to certain music,
        think of the past-good and bad,...and you...
For, I am a dreaming, optimistic pessimist.

I fully understand that not everyone understands.
i say, "Every moment is precious,...
        and should be cherished..."
I dream of futures--times unseen;
         of the past, and its repetition, times to come.
I try to achieve my best in what i do.
I hope to once more, find that someone i lost...
and Until further notice,...
        I am a Dreaming, Optimistic pessimist....